One sunny day, I stopped at a tiny produce stand at the edge of a cornfield (Ohio). It sold an unusual assortment of fruits, vegetables, bakery goods, and crafts…
Grandpa Farmer said the corn was picked this morning from his field but the other things were from all over. The blackberries and peaches were part of a cooperative exchange with a family farm in Georgia–local truckers just added his shipment to their usual transport loads and made an extra stop at the farm in the towns they passed. He said he also barters an exchange of his corn and melons for fresh baked goods from a local restaurant (Der Dutchman).
What I thought was remarkable was that even in 2010 and the days of social media and networking, these family farmers were still exchanging goods and services the old-fashioned way. Their B-to-B (business-to-business) offline business model was still built on personal relationships and trust. Getting fresh products to individual customers. Going the extra mile, literally.
Community Inclusion
There were about five shoppers there at the time I was there. None of us knew each other, and none of us really even gave each other eye contact. But, we all probably lived within a short distance of each other.
In older times this would have been an important social time to exchange family and community news. This face-to-face exchange also made it easier for people with disabilities to be included in the community. It took people with all sorts of skills to work at the farm and stores, and they were each a person connected to families and neighbors–not just strange strangers.
Other than my questions, there was no conversation other than Grandpa Farmer asking us to “pay with the smallest bills possible.”
But while this was typical B-to-C (business to consumer) social behavior for 2010, considering the centuries-old social and business exchange model of corn for blackberries, and corn for snickerdoodle cookies, I was feeling nostalgic and wishing for the past face-to-face friendly social interactions of an ancient market square and a community where people actually knew and cared about each other.
Seth Godin, the marketing and social media guru wrote a book called Linchpin: Are you indispensable? (Penguin, 2010) about the power of one person to make a difference, and be remarkable.
If this farmer really understood this, he could have been the Linchpin, he could have made shopping at the produce stand a different experience than shopping at the large superstore where the produce looks great but there are no plows, wagons, or rows of corn anywhere in sight. He missed his opportunity to build relationships and make his customers loyal friends instead of just people who were asked to pay small bills.
So I guess my takeaway is that online or offline, the way we communicate and build our business model, deliver products, and interact with our neighbors and customers can be personal or impersonal. The method of delivery, the social media are not what make the difference.
PEOPLE MAKE THE DIFFERENCE.
The Aaron difference
Most people say my son Aaron, who has the label of autism has few social skills. In fact, some experts would say people with autism cannot even have social interactions, that is the definition of autism. But I’d be willing to bet if Aaron had been with me, while we were at the produce stand he would have sung, “Old McDonald” a hundred times and gotten everyone there to join in. Everyone there would be smiling by the time they left. Aaron would have given them a personal and memorable experience. Aaron would have been the Linchpin. He would have made sure everyone connected.
Comments Please:
Who are the Linchpins in your life? Who is so indispensable that your life would be different without them?
Keep Climbing: Onward and Upward.
All the best,
Mary
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In case you missed it:
Day 1: “Every Day for 30 Days” Blogging Challenge or “IBP” (Individual Blogging Plan) Day 1 of the 30-Day-Every-Day Blogging challenge. (click here)
Day 2: Memory Rocks: not being objective (click here).
Day 3: Turning it over to the professionals (click here)
Day 4: An Avalanche and an Aaron story (click here)
Day 5: “The Host” vs. the Home Stagers vs. Aaron (click here)
Day 6: “There is no spoon?” Disability Style (click here)
Check out what my challenge partner Alison Golden of The Secret Life of a Warrior Woman:
Hi Mary and others. I like the story too. Like Elaine I to can picture Aaron singing and getting the whole crowd into. The people also might annoyed and demand you control him.
Allison is right as a whole children are indeed great linchpins. I can’t. I have noticed that many parents discourage the children from interacting with strangers. I don’t think it’s the technology so much as the need to sit, be quiet, don’t make waves, and do as you in school are told that changes them.
Have a great day.
HI Gary,
Thanks Aaron is one of a kind indeed.
I think the difference between children talking to strangers, or not, has to do with the parent being physically there. I think that makes the difference.
By Seth Godin’s definition of linchpin, British people would be extremely un-linchpin like. When two of us find ourselves together outside the UK, we’re generally slow to even acknowledge the fact. Something my American husband finds very strange but I have found it to be true over decades and many, many Brits. Children are huge linchpins, pity they often lose the ability as they grow up and technology takes over.
You are absolutely right Alison. Children have a gift for connecting people. I had no idea about the Brits being so…so… British.
Mary,
Thanks for sharing this story and your experience at this roadside produce stand. Obviously, you spent time talking with the farmer to learn about his intentions. I could even visualize what it would have been like if your son had been with you to engage others in singing. I certainly would have joined in.
Here is my question for you. Did I misread your post? I’m confused why you weren’t the Linchpin. You have the awareness that many others lack. What could you have done to act as the catalyst to change the experience for everyone, including yourself, that was at the stand with you?
Where ever I show up, I try to engage others. This could be standing in the checkout line at Jungle Jim’s or anywhere. Even though I model connecting, I don’t think people walk away saying that was great. I could do that for myself the next time I’m in a public setting. So how do we connect the dots for them?
This is part of the work I am doing on myself currently. Can I be fully present where ever I show up? And, be responsible for my own experience by engaging or removing myself if I’m not allowed to contribute.
This looks like an opportunity for you to show up differently. It sounds like your son already does this.
Elaine, you made me laugh with your last sentence. Aaron definitely shows up differently.
I like to think he is the Linchpin because he demands and commands the experience. Often I can sneak beneath the radar if I choose to be invisible. Aaron just does it. I think it is one of his special gifts.
I think the fact you are even trying to interact is honorable. The grocery clerks and baggers are often ignored all together. I do try to give them eye contact and make them feel valuable. Let’s go to Jungle Jim’s together sometime. Might be fun to have Linchpins on the Loose–sounds like a T-shirt…. 🙂
LOL – now you made me laugh. Yes, Linchpins on the loose. I like it. Yes, we could go to Jungle Jim’s sometime. Eric and I are just home from there now.
I love engaging with people where ever I am. It sort of requires that I am standing – I have done a drive by – so to speak. Standing in one place, looking at fruit, veggies, any line – then I have to talk with whoever will make eye contact – sometimes they don’t even have to make eye contact – I just start talking to them about whatever is in front of us. 🙂
I’ll bet you bring joy into many people’s lives and you might not even know it.
Mary – what a lovely thing to say. I like hearing that – I hope that is true – thinking I might have brightened someone’s day gives me a warm feeling. thank you.
Believe it!